The Case for Parental Self-Care & How to Make it Happen this Summer!

As the school year winds down and summer break approaches, many parents find themselves caught between excitement and overwhelm. While longer days and more flexible schedules can be refreshing, summer often brings a unique set of challenges—juggling childcare, disrupted routines, family travel, and the pressure to create magical memories. In all this hustle, there’s one thing parents frequently forget: themselves.

Self-care isn’t just about spa days and bubble baths—though those can help. It’s about creating space to rest, reflect, and recharge so you can show up as the best version of yourself for your family. When parents are depleted, stress trickles down to children. On the flip side, a calm, well-supported parent creates a more stable and joyful home environment.

Summer is an ideal time to reflect on your needs and carve out realistic self-care practices that fit into your family’s rhythm. Small shifts to prioritize your well-being can make a helpful impact! 

1. Build Breaks Into the Day:  Even 10–15 minutes of intentional alone time—reading a book, stretching, sitting outside with coffee—can make a difference. Communicate with your partner or support network about your need for brief daily breaks.

2. Reframe What “Fun” Means:  You don’t need a packed calendar of adventures to give your child a great summer. Unstructured time, boredom, and backyard play are incredibly valuable. Give yourself permission to skip the over-scheduling.

3. Create a Flexible Family Rhythm: While it’s tempting to let go of routines entirely, having a loose daily structure helps everyone feel more grounded. Try a simple framework (e.g., morning activities, afternoon quiet time, evening bath or shower).

4. Connect With Other Parents: Isolation is a major stressor. Set up park meetups, join a local parent group, or rotate playdates with trusted friends to give kids time together—and give yourself a breather.

5. Be Honest With Your Limits: You’re allowed to say no to activities, events, or commitments that drain you. Modeling boundaries teaches kids to respect their own needs, too.

6. Include Your Own Joy in the Plan: Schedule things that fill your cup—whether it’s a solo walk, hobby time, or a date night. Summer shouldn’t just be about the kids. You matter, too!

Parenting is a constant act of giving—but you can’t pour from an empty cup. By taking steps to care for yourself, you’re not being selfish—you’re investing in your family’s well-being. When you are calm, centered, and emotionally nourished, your kids benefit just as much as you do. So this summer, alongside sunscreen and snacks, pack in a little self-compassion. You’ve earned it! 

10 Tips To Live Your Family’s Values Through Healthy Limits and Boundaries

As parents, we strive to raise children who are kind, responsible, and true to their values. One of the best ways to do this is by setting clear, healthy boundaries that align with your family's core beliefs. Here are ten practical tips to help you live out your family’s values authentically while fostering a sense of security and respect at home.

1. Clarify Your Family Values

Before setting boundaries, take time to reflect on what truly matters to your family. Is it honesty, kindness, responsibility, or balance? Make these values clear and use them as a guide for decision-making.

2. Model the Behavior You Want to See

Children learn best by example. If you want them to respect limits, demonstrate self-discipline and healthy boundaries in your own life—whether that’s managing screen time, setting work-life balance, or prioritizing meaningful relationships.

3. Communicate Openly and Consistently

Boundaries work best when they are clearly explained. Have regular conversations with your children about why certain rules exist and how they align with your family’s values.

4. Establish Age-Appropriate Boundaries

Set expectations that are realistic for your child’s age and development. What works for a teenager might not be suitable for a preschooler. Adjust as they grow while keeping core values consistent.

5. Encourage Responsibility and Accountability

Instead of enforcing rules with punishment, help children understand the natural consequences of their actions. If they forget their homework, let them experience the result instead of rushing to fix it for them.

6. Create Healthy Digital Boundaries

Technology plays a huge role in family life, so set guidelines that support your values. This could mean screen-free family meals, designated tech-free zones, or limits on social media use to encourage mindful consumption.

7. Prioritize Emotional Well-Being

Respect your child’s emotions while maintaining firm limits. Encourage them to express their feelings, but also guide them in learning self-regulation and resilience.

8. Balance Flexibility and Structure

Boundaries should be firm but adaptable. Life changes, and so do children’s needs. Stay open to adjusting rules when necessary while keeping the foundation of your values intact.

9. Make Family Time Non-Negotiable

Protect quality time together by setting limits around work, extracurricular activities, and screen use. Prioritize shared meals, game nights, or outdoor activities to reinforce connection and belonging.

10. Lead with Love and Respect

Boundaries should never be about control but rather about fostering mutual respect and love. When children feel valued and heard, they are more likely to respect the limits you set.

By setting intentional boundaries that reflect your values, you create a home environment where your children feel safe, respected, and guided toward a life of integrity and purpose.

"Reena's Recommendations"

Several years ago, I curated a list of recommended items to support children’s independence, creativity, and confidence from a Montessori parenting perspective. I am not getting anything in return for recommending specific brands or products - so please note that these are just simply ideas to consider if you are looking for child-sized kitchen tools or furniture, or creative and open-ended play materials & suggestions!

~ Reena’s Recommendations ~

The list also has recommended books, many of which are also on this Resource page of my website. You’ll find additional recommendations such as articles, podcasts, or websites to check out there as well!

Happy browsing!

Bee Well - Reena

Reflecting at year 2...

While I am proud and grateful for the past 2 years, I am also writing this post past 10pm, running on fumes—because when else will I have the time to do it? As I reflect on where I was, where I am now, and where I am headed, I appreciate it all! I am grateful for the relationships I have cultivated with parents and among schools. I am grateful to have colleagues to work in partnership with Hive! I am grateful to be driving to East Lakeview some days and Englewood other days. I am grateful to jump on coaching calls with teachers, administrators, and parents when I can make the time! Everything has been an opportunity to learn, grow, fail, succeed, try again, be afraid, be brave, be resilient - and just bee (be still). Ok, admittedly, this last one is not happening as much as I would like for it to happen! I value the power of slowing down & taking time to pause and reflect, yet I know this is not something I’m doing well. Since having started Hive, I find myself saying “yes” to nearly all opportunities that come my way because it’s a chance to continue to grow, learn, support, work! However, I know that if I continue at this current pace, I am heading towards burnout. So now what? Honestly, I’m not sure. It’s only the start of a new school year and I’m getting myself oriented to the children, teachers, parents, & communities - hopefully over these next 8 months (the school year), it will become more clear and apparent to me, how to better balance it all - work, family, and life in general. For now, I’ll keep practicing gratitude. Thank you for reading :) Bee Well.

Mindfulness & Montessori - 10 Summer Parenting Tips...

As the warmth of mid-summer envelopes us, parents often find themselves navigating a unique set of challenges and opportunities. Balancing relaxation with engaging activities and maintaining a harmonious atmosphere at home can be both rewarding and demanding. Drawing from the principles of Montessori and Conscious Parenting, here are ten tips to make the most of this summer break together:

1. Create & Maintain a Prepared Environment In Montessori philosophy, the environment plays a crucial role in a child’s development. Set up designated areas in home where your child can explore and engage in activities independently. This might include a reading corner, art station, toy area (where items are not too cluttered and easy to find). If you have an outdoor space, this can be curated with with natural materials for creative play. Remember, freedom comes with responsibility - allow them access to get what they need, play where they wish, so long as the expectations are clear and they are responsible with these privileges!

2. Follow the Child’s Lead Observe your child’s interests and inclinations, and offer activities that allow for explorative opportunities accordingly. Whether it’s open water play, sand play, gardening, building with blocks or sticks, or exploring nature trails, allow them the freedom to choose activities that captivate their curiosity (while again, being clear on the expectations so they can manage the freedom within clear boundaries and guidelines).

3. Foster Independence Encourage your child to take on age-appropriate responsibilities, such as packing their own pool/beach bag, helping with meal preparation, planning the excursion for the day… This fosters independence, respects & values their opinions, builds confidence, and gives them some choice and control over their day—cornerstones of both Montessori and conscious parenting.

4. Limit Screen Time Summer can tempt children to spend more time indoors with screens. Set clear & consistent limits/boundaries and offer alternatives like outdoor chalking, biking, free-play, or indoor fort-building, drawing, story-writing, board games to keep them engaged in creative, hands-on exploration with the world around them.

5. Engage in Nature Nature offers abundant learning opportunities and promotes a sense of wonder. Nature also grounds and calms us with healthy, natural sensory input. Take nature walks, observe wildlife, or simply spend time at your local playground/park. Encourage free-play, socialization, & open exploration.

6. Cultivate Mindfulness & Gratitude Practice mindfulness together as a family through activities like meditation, yoga, & reflection. Carve out time to express gratitude by acknowledging the people & things that made the day possible. This helps children develop self-awareness, emotional resilience, empathy & nurtures a sense of calm amidst the summer excitement.

7. Encourage Real-Life Experiences Involve your child in everyday tasks such as loading the dishwasher, sorting laundry, helping with the grocery shopping, visiting farmers’ markets, or organizing a picnic. These experiences provide valuable opportunities to learn about responsibility, community engagement, and the joy of shared activities that add valuable contributions to the family.

8. Prioritize Rest and Routine Maintain a balance between adventure and rest by establishing a daily routine. Ensure your child gets enough sleep, stays hydrated, and enjoys nutritious meals, which are essential for their physical and emotional well-being during the summer months.

9. Allow them to be “bored” You do not have to schedule and plan for your child at all times! In preparing areas of your home that allow for open-ended free play, your child can manage and find ways to entertain themselves! They can create art, build with blocks, play with dolls, trucks and get carried away within their imaginations!

10. Model Your Values (Respect, Kindness and Empathy) Above all, embody the values your family holds in high regard - discuss what these are as a family and acknowledge when you see it in action! When we model values such as respect, empathy, and kindness in our interactions with our children and others, we are teaching by example valuable life lessons and encouraging our child to consider the feelings and perspectives of those around them.

Summer provides a wonderful opportunity to deepen your relationships with your children. Enjoy this time of growth, discovery, and joyful connection together!

The More Reflective We Are, The More Effective We Are...

I love working as a Parenting Coach and supporting parents on their own unique journeys through parenthood! I truly believe the Universe sent me 3 children, within 3 years, to test my strength as a mother - and I’m here to tell you, there are times that I have “failed” this test (and still do)!! However, these moments continue to give me the opportunity to reflect on the mistakes I make, think about how I could have done better, and then try again …and again…and again! Despite all the theoretical trainings I have, the reality of parenting is HARD! No child is the same, no parent is the same, no relationships between two people are the same. Which is why Parent Coaching is not the same for everyone - it takes into account the unique histories we all have from how we were parented; the unique temperaments of our children; and our own unique nervous system “activators.” As a certified Parent Coach, I listen to parents, reflect with them to dig deeper, and help them become more aware & set specific intentions and goals. The more aware we are, the more intentional we are, and thus the more effective we are in our parenting goals & relationships. With the support of the Jai Institute, I offer a 12 week guided course that is an intensive 1:1 program for parents ready to do deep work in strengthening their “parenting muscles.” When the 12 weeks would pass, I knew I wanted to gift my clients a parenting journal to help them continue to be reflective and intentional in their goals (whether they continued to work with me or not). I created Bee Well, a guided parenting journal, to help with this hope and goal as they continue to do ongoing self-work of building awareness, setting intentions, making time for reflection, & continuing to grow as parents! I hope it’s helpful for all parents on their own unique journeys. Also please check out my Workshops page for upcoming events (a free one is coming up on June 13)!

It Takes a Village (or a Hive)! Bee Well!

Parenting from the Head, Heart, Hand...

Check out this post I wrote for the Jai Institute’s blog on Head, Heart, Hand Parenting!

Presence > Presents

This holiday season, let’s practice “presence” rather than “presents.”  Being truly present for our children means giving them our full attention & intentionally putting away our smartphones, or carving out time to play with them, or doing a special activity with them.  Creating experiences and memories of togetherness will be the greatest gift you can give your child - it will fill them up with feelings of love, joy, and self-worth. 

Here are a few ideas of ways you can create meaningful experiences together that will be fun and rewarding for not only your child, but for you as well!

Bake cookies together (or a pie or another holiday treat!).  Allow your child to help measure and mix the ingredients - it’s okay if things get a little messy - they learn through trying and practicing and need to be given opportunities to do so (and what a great sensorial experience for them to smell, taste, touch)!  Offer to share some with neighbors, friends, family to spread the joy and love!

Make homemade holiday cards to share with others and send messages of care and gratitude! You can use blank card-stock paper & your child can draw a picture on one side and write a note on the other side. For young children, you can help dictate their message, such as “Dear Grandma, I love you,” or whatever your child is inspired to say to the recipient of the card!

Play board games, card games, or charades together!  Such games help build children’s social skills, empathy skills, & patience! Even young children can learn to play games such as Shoots and Ladders, Candy Land, Uno, or Go Fish! Children love to play these games with you! Play is a child’s “love language!”

What are some fun holiday traditions and memories you can recall as a child with your family? What traditions do you want to continue with your family?  What new traditions would you like to start together? Share your ideas in the comments below!

Happy Holidays - Wishing You Well!

Cultivating an Attitude of Gratitude

November is often associated with gratitude, as we gather together with friends and family to give Thanks. While it’s wonderful to actively practice Gratitude during this time of year, it’s important to try and do so all year long, even in little ways. Actively practicing gratitude has been shown to support mental health by fostering more joy, resilience and compassion.

When we embrace gratitude, we are strengthening our emotional intelligence & empathy for others. Gratitude reminds us that we're all inter-connected as valued and purposeful members of a community.

Here are a few concrete ways to practice Gratitude together as a family:

• Hold weekly family meetings and give compliments and/or share moments you appreciated someone for doing something helpful or kind.

• Leave little “thank you” notes for your children (modeling this may inspire them to do the same) - if your child is pre-literate, you can draw a picture of what you are grateful for!

• Invite your children to write a note or do an act of kindness for someone who helps your family in some way (mail carrier, teacher, school administrator, neighbor).

• Invite your family to share all the things they are thankful for and post or frame this in your home. This can serve as a beautiful reminder and reflection of your family’s values.

• Each evening, at dinner or bedtime, invite each family member to share something they are grateful for that day!

September Reflections: A Year Since I Started Hive

A little over a year ago, after 18 years at the same place of work (but I wouldn’t call it work, it had become a second home, an extended family), I resigned. Due to what I call the “Covid effect” my work was in a state of constant change - the change fatigue was so thick and dense, I did not even realize how completely and totally exhausted I had become. So when yet another big change was going into effect, it was just too much, and I decided to choose my mental health over my work. I chose to leave without any clear next steps for myself. I left and had a mix of so. many. emotions: guilt, fear, anger, curiosity, excitement, nervousness, courage…

I asked myself what did I love doing and how can I do it on my own terms? I care deeply for the well-being of others. I especially could relate to the challenges as both an educator and a parent, of the heavy responsibility of caring for children - wanting to “get it right” while simultaneously struggling with all the very real and tough challenges that comes with this cosmic task. Throughout my journey as both a parent and educator, I am still making mistakes - it’s the truth of this work - caring for children is NOT easy! There is no such thing as “perfect” - I personally really dislike this word because I believe perfection is an illusion. There is no such thing as a perfect parent, perfect teacher, perfect anything - mistakes are how we grow and learn! We teach this to our children, but forget to allow this for ourselves in our own journeys with them. When we make mistakes with our children (if we yell, control, shame, guilt) we have to work through these mistakes with ourselves & with them. When we recognize our error, we take ownership by apologizing to our child and we commit to doing better. This is an essential part of our work with both children and with ourselves.

I am grateful for this new path I am forging this year, in this next chapter of my journey. Over this past year, I have taken time to reflect and learn from my past experiences. I have a better relationship with and awareness of my emotions. I am constantly learning to tune into them and accept them in a more healthy and productive way. I am much more accepting of what is and what can be. I am striving to be more patient, present, intentional, and grateful in my every day thoughts, actions, and experiences for myself, for others, and especially for children.

Playful Summer Ideas & Activities...

Summer is my favorite season (maybe because I live in Chicago and we have some pretty harsh winters)! I love taking advantage of the warmer weather and getting outdoors with my children! Here is a list of some fun summer activities that won’t break your budget!

• Create a fairy (or animal, or dinosaur) garden - you can make this with little trinkets your child may already have. Incorporate elements from nature (sticks, pinecones, rocks) to create little structures (you can organically use it as an opportunity to practice counting and expand vocabulary - “let’s find 10 sticks to make a little path”…or “lets look for smooth pebbles to decorate the perimeter”)!

• Create a rock garden! Find rocks and paint them - they can be a beautiful addition to any garden and can even be a sweet gift for grandparents, friends, etc!

• Water play! You do not need to buy a specific water table - you can create this with a large plastic container and everyday objects from your kitchen such as measuring cups, a baster, a ladle, sponges! You can do this outdoors or inside - just place a big towel as a “mat” when indoors!

• Sidewalk chalk fun! Chalk may be a little messy but it’s so fun to create shapes, draw paths (for trike/bike rides), draw pictures, practice name writing, number writing, etc! Act of kindness: leave little pictures or messages in front of your neighbors’ homes!

• Lemonade stand! (or you can ‘sell’ snow cones, cookies, homemade crafts) - your child can do an act of kindness and have a stand without a set price but ask for a donation - this is a great way to help your child learn to give back and can donate profits to a charity of their choice (animal shelters are a favorite in our home)!

• Snail Mail! Who doesn’t love receiving a little note in the mailbox? This is a great activity for a rainy day - your child can draw a picture or write a note to a friend or relative! This little act of kindness is a sure way to put a smile on anyone’s face!

Playing with our children in these ways strengthens our relationships with them because we are speaking their “love language!” When we play with them in big or small ways, we are putting healthy “deposits” into their reserves and creating loving, supportive relationships with our children!

10 Principles of Head, Heart, Hand Parenting...

If you are interested in learning more about the below 10 Principles to Head, Heart, Hand Parenting, check out our upcoming Parent Workshop Series (5 weeks) OR to take an even deeper dive & learn more about our 1:1 Parenting Coaching opportunities within a 12 week framework!

1. Informed & Aware

2. Intentional & Reflective

3. Committed to Growth

4. All Feelings are Valid and Welcome

5. Attuned & Empathetic

6. Kindness, Acceptance, & Forgiveness

7. Connecting Before Correcting

8. Commitment to Safety 

9. Boundaries & Values

10. Joy, Play, Fun

Family Values & Boundaries

What family values did you grow up with? How and why were these valued?

Reflecting on your own family and your role as a parent, what values come to mind for your family? How are these being upheld and are you confident in your “why?” - why are these values necessary and important for your family to uphold? If you feel confident in your “why” then you will feel confident in working to uphold these values…

Here are two important ways to help instill family values:

1. Try to consistently MODEL your family’s values. If you want your child to say “please and thank you,” then you should be saying it. If you want your child to use a respectful tone of voice, then you should be speaking respectfully. Your modeling is not just in interactions with your child, but with anyone! At stores, at work, while driving - children are absorbing and watching our actions constantly. By the time the child is 9 or 10 years old, they have made a lot of observations of their parents’ behaviors and have learned the difference between “do as I say…” vs. “act as I do” (in big and small ways).

2. To help uphold your family’s values, be CLEAR & CONSISTENT in setting the appropriate BOUNDARIES. For example, if your child speaks in a rude way, you can calmly and kindly hold the boundary connected to your family’s values by gently reminding them: “It’s OK to feel angry. One of our family’s values is to express our feelings in a way that does not cause more hurt or harm. When I hear that tone, I feel attacked. I’m here to help. Can you share with me what’s going on in a way that will feel OK for us both and help us move forward?” Or another example, if your family values limited screen time and your child is arguing with you about wanting more, you can say something such as, “Our family values balancing screen time with other activities. Our agreed upon time was 30 minutes and it’s now past that time. Would you like me to turn off the TV or will you be able to do so?” The more you say what you mean and mean what you say, the less they will try and negotiate because they have clear and consistent boundaries that they know are non-negotiable.

Wishing you well!

Happiest of Holidays

This holiday season, I hope you’ll receive the below 3 tips as my gift to you :)

Wishing You Well…

1. You cannot fill someone else’s “cup” if your “cup” is low or empty. Take time to keep your cup full, whether that means small acts of self care such as drinking your coffee while it’s actually hot, listening to your favorite podcast, or even having 5 minutes of alone time by going for a walk around the block!

2. You are the only one in charge of setting your own boundaries. Do not allow yourself to feel guilty, pressured, or frustrated - give yourself permission to say “no” if you know the ask, whatever it might be, will create added stress, anxiety, frustration…

3. Commit to being fully present. In our digital world, we can be constantly distracted by pings and dings all day if we allow that to happen. Silence your phone AND move it away from you! This is especially important when you are with others (ie. family meal times; movie night, date night with your partner)! If you find yourself getting distracted, and not fully engaged in the present moment, notice it and bring your attention back to the person or task in front of you!

Wishing you and your family a wonderful holiday season and a very joyful 2023!

Holidays, Children, & Gratitude

So much to share on this topic! I’ll try and share 3 Tips that I hope will help you and your family over the Holidays!

After the craziness of the past few years and having to spend the holidays social distancing, bubbling/podding, or stressing about whether or not to visit the grandparents, we are all eager and excited to gather together again during this season!

Tip 1. If you envision everything being “perfectly planned” - you will likely be setting yourself up for disappointment. I am not discouraging you from planning those activities for the airplane, packing extra cloths for the get-together, or having a variety of snacks at the ready! - just be open to the possibilities of navigating unexpected, confusing, potentially overwhelming moments as parents. Young children thrive on consistency and routine - they often have little control over what’s on the agenda for the day so they will naturally be a bit off when the routine is very different from the norm! They may also be “off” if they are sleeping in a different bed/bedroom, meeting unfamiliar faces, not in their usual nap/bedtime routine… This is all par for the course over the holidays - and the best thing you can do is try not to get overwhelmed by their big emotions - it’s understandable! Empathy, compassion, and patience will go a long way during these times. So when gathering with relatives, if grandpa is insisting on hugs and your little one is not feeling it, don’t force it or get discouraged by their unwillingness to partake in this gesture (especially because you don’t want to send mixed messages about body boundaries)! Instead, you can help model, empathize, and coach your little one by saying something like, “I understand that you may not be feeling up for a hug right now. It’s been a busy day! It’s OK if you need a little space right now. You can let Grandpa know that maybe later, you may come back for that hug!”

Tip 2. If you and/or your child are feeling overwhelmed, stressed, or just wanting a break - take it! We as adults can often feel “stimulus overload” and for young children, especially if they are not used to gatherings post pandemic, they will especially crave breaks and quiet time! When we are constantly “on” - whether it’s hosting guests or visiting relatives in another city - it’s often hard to build in some downtime, but those quiet moments are so necessary to recharge everyone’s batteries! You will need to do this too, so you are not running on an “empty cup” by the end - It will be hard to care for and “fill” others’ cups if your’s is low!

Tip 3. Practice Gratitude. We may sometimes get caught up in the hustle, bustle, and commercialization of the season that we don’t often pause often enough to mindfully and actively practice gratitude. Whether it’s jotting things down in a journal for your reflection, or sending a text of appreciation to a friend or loved one, or inviting each family member to share what they are grateful for at the dinner table (and not just on Thanksgiving), there is power in being mindfully grateful! Not only is active gratitude healing and restorative, it helps keep things in perspective!

Wishing You Well Happy Thanksgiving!

Family Contributions

Children feel valued, confident, and proud when they are trusted with meaningful and purposeful tasks. We all like to feel valued, especially when we can contribute to our communities in helpful and salient ways.

Some tips to consider when building your child’s understanding of a Family Contribution…

1. Never force the child – you can invite them, and offer to support alongside; step in when they need necessary help or a little “how to” nudge.

2. Offer child-sized “tools” (brooms, mops, cooking utensils) - this will help them be more successful than trying to manage something that is too big for their small hands.

3. Slow down and take time to show your child HOW to do these tasks. Break them down into simple steps.

   • Keep your movements slow, and limit yourself from “too much” talking – with your slow movements and less distraction, it will make it easier for your child to follow your guidance.

   • Scaffold skills – start with one step at a time. Trust in your child’s capabilities and build upon the skill - do not underestimate them!

4. Honor and appreciate everyone’s Family Contribution (children and parents), no matter how big or small!

5. Let go of perfection! – you may find that the spill is not completely wiped up, the napkins are not folded just right, or the bed is not as crisply made as you would like - it’s OK! So long as it’s not dangerous, allow them these opportunities to make “low-stake mistakes.” With time, repetition and practice, they will develop this skill (if you “call out” their mistakes, they will be less inclined to want to try again)!

6. Enjoy yourselves – if it starts to feel stressful, take a little break and come back to it later and try again.

Contributions ages 2 and 3

• Pick up toys and books.

• Put laundry in the hamper

• Help feed pets.

• Help wipe up spills or sweep up messes.

• Sort laundry (such as match pairs of socks, pile up their underwear, place washcloths together)!

Contributions ages 4-5

• (Same as Above)

• Help make their bed.

• Clear and set the table.

• Dust.

• Help with washing, chopping, preparing fruits, veggies, snacks.

• Carrying and putting away groceries.

• Watering plants

Contributions ages 6-8

• (Same as above)

• Take care of pets (walk the dog; clean the cat’s litter box)

• Vacuum and mop.

• Take out ​the trash.

• Fold and put away laundry.

• Make lunches for school

• Pour their own cereal/milk for breakfast

• Help write family shopping list

Wishing You Well!

"Neutral Time" Conversations

It’s really hard to rationalize with someone (child or adult) when emotions are running high! For children especially, because they are still building their impulse control, self-regulation, and coping strategies, it is especially hard to try and coach or problem solve in the moment if they are already having a tough time.

In such situations, when feelings are just “too big” - it’s best to help your child try and work through those feelings and find ways to cope and self-regulate so it doesn’t have to feel so overwhelming. Validating feelings is a great first step: “I understand that must have been frustrating when the Baby knocked over your blocks.” Helping them find a way to regulate would be a great next step: “Would you like a hug or a drink of water?” You can assess if your child is ready to have the conversation now or maybe wait a little bit for a more “neutral state” to be sure the heightened emotions have passed.

When your child is truly calm, then they can listen more clearly and make a plan more thoughtfully, with some guidance from a trusted adult…

“Earlier when the Baby knocked down your blocks, you were really upset - I understand how you were feeling AND I noticed those angry shouts really scared the Baby…I’m wondering if there might be a better way to handle that problem next time, if the Baby makes that mistake and you feel angry - do you think there’s a way to solve the problem that would not scare the Baby?”…

Hopefully some good ideas are generated such as “ask a grown up for help,” OR “tell the Baby to stop in a calmer tone” OR “give the Baby some blocks to play with too.” Your child may come up with some ideas on their own, or may need some help with other solutions! Once a new way to handle the problem has been agreed upon, role play and practice together!

It may seem silly but it really helps your child practice finding the right words in the heightened emotional moment if they’ve roll-played and feel confident they know what to say and how to say it next time they are in a similar situation!

Wishing You Well!

Setting Intentions

Setting a daily intention as a parent or as a family is a great way to reflect on your and your family’s values and start your day with a concrete way in how you will consciously work to live your values.

For example, an intention for yourself can look something like this:

“Today, I intend to be aware of my tone of voice.” You can write it, say it aloud, share it with your partner for additional accountability. Then, really practice being mindful of this intention throughout your day. You may even want to practice (at certain intervals of the day, such as lunch time, or when driving) by checking in with yourself about how this going for you.

An example of intention for your family can look something like this:

“As a family today, what do you think we should focus on? {If your children are able to help generate ideas, then you can plan them out for the next few days based on their suggestions}! Ok, it sounds like we all are in agreement that we are setting an intention to take deep breaths when we start to feel frustrated.” You can practice together as a family; have a friendly signal for each other if you all agree it will be helpful; or just model it for each other if someone may need this gentle reminder! At the end of the day, you can reflect back together on how everyone did. Remember, no shame or judgement if someone was not very good at this that day! Remind them (or yourself) that this can always be practiced again another day, and “practice makes progress.”

Sharing a few more resources on this topic: https://theblissfulmind.com/daily-intentions/ …https://chopra.com/articles/start-your-day-with-a-clear-intention …https://preparedparents.org/tip/help-your-kid-set-intentions/

Wishing You Well - Reena

5 Back to School Tips!

Whether this is your child’s first time going to school or returning back to school, getting into a new routine takes time. Here are 5 tips to help make this transition a little easier for all!

1. Keep a consistent routine! On school days, morning routines should be consistent and predictable so there are no surprises for anyone (young children especially thrive on knowing what is coming up). For mornings: brush teeth, change cloths, eat breakfast, shoes & lunch/backpacks - and out the door! For evenings: dinner, bath, book, bed.

2. Post visual steps of the schedule(s)! You and your child can help create this together. If your child is pre-literacy, draw pictures of the routine and steps in the sequence they need to complete them. This gives the child some control and autonomy to manage themselves and avoids you having to constantly nag and remind them! You can just say “check the chart” - they can even “check off” if it’s laminated!

3. Get a good night’s rest! Young children’s brains need plenty of rest to restore and rejuvenate for the next day. Avoid screens 2 hours before bedtime and allow ample time for your child to wind down for the evening. Adults need all of this too - so try and model this for your child as well!

4. Allow for a little extra time in the mornings. When we are constantly in a rush and saying “hurry up,” or “go faster,” or “we don’t have time for that…” it can feel really stressful (if our partners said this to us each morning, we’d start feeling pretty grumpy too - so just imagine how your young child may be feeling)! Try to have certain things ready the night before so you are not feeling so rushed in the morning (ie. make lunches before bed; have clothes pick out already; socks next to shoes; etc).

5. Be OK with the fact that transitions take time. Your child will have ups and downs at drop off time, and this is a normal part of the process until they are comfortable and familiar with the people, expectations, and routines of their day. Children are so acutely attuned to our feelings and will sense our anxiety, frustration, sadness - so try to be aware of what you are projecting - hopefully trust, faith, and optimism that they will get there! Also, empathy goes a long way - if your child is having a hard morning, you can validate those feelings by saying something to the effect of “I understand that school is still new and you are still learning about everything. I get that. I feel nervous too when I’m in a new place. When I started a new job, it took me a little time to figure it out and feel comfortable. I know you’ll get there soon.”

Best wishes to your whole family for this new school year! - Reena